Effie Macleod is a demon, and a damned good one at that. For an eternity Effie has made her name convincing humans to bargain away their souls to Lucifer. They earn their hearts desire, and she gets to keep doing her job. So what if it doesn’t feel like she’s truly lived in centuries. After putting it all on the line to help Lucifer’s favorite demon win back her soul and her life, Effie is demoted. Now her days are spent rage baiting the humans of the internet with improper recipe substitutions and Reddit defenses of terrible TV characters. When her boyfriend Belphegor, a prince of hell, proposes, she decides to finally leave the past behind. Unfortunately, she is informed that her impending nuptials are not valid, as Effie is already married. In sixteenth century Scotland, she bound herself to her husband Finn Macdonald in her current life and the next. This soul pact was literal and while she has spent centuries helping Lucifer collect souls, Finn has been reincarnated over and over again. With no choice but to convince Finn to dissolve their marriage, Effie travels to Georgia. There, in a local bar, she comes face to face with her husband who has no memories of their life together, nor his reincarnations, yet still refuses a divorce. Effie can’t leave without obtaining her divorce, but the longer she stays the deeper she falls into their past, the present, and the future she and Finn could claim. But hell may have other plans.
There is something so Bellefleurian about a demon showing up in a small town to convince her current husband to divorce—except her husband has reincarnated and has no memory of her. Bellefleur completely outdoes herself once more with this interconnected follow up to the delightful paranormal escapade that was The Devil She Knows. Damned If I Do is paranormal romance perfection, a reincarnation second chance romance involving one demon’s quest to convince her reincarnated, mortal husband for a divorce, and the stubborn man who loves her despite their missing lives and memories. Damned If I Do is an angst fest, as only a reincarnation story can be. The Bellefleur promise is one of angst yes, but also one of bisexuality (of course), determined women, and hilarious hijinks in the name of love. This novel sees love as not the absence of grief, but one that honors it as an essential part of loving. Threaded through with a homesickness that takes hold from that first meeting all the way to the happy ever after, Bellefleur roots us in the notion of home as a perpetual pursuit—which can be secured in finding our person, in choosing the love we’ve yearned for. Home as something chosen, again and again. In Damned If I Do, the romance is something devilish and the plot a mix of historical romance, paranormal, and rom com. The devil may work hard, yes, but Alexandria Bellefleur certainly works harder.
You could not find a book more geared toward my tastes than Damned If I Do, nor should you attempt to. It’s demonic, it’s bisexual, it’s angsty. My three favorite flavors, together in one romance novel. Two people—the demon and the bartender—chart the path toward reconnection after centuries of separation, with one small town and a child in tow. Along the way, they’ll confront pesky gnomes, determined townspeople, and the ghosts of their past lives encroaching on their present. Damned If I Do is like if Life As We Know It, Outlander, and Sweet Home Alabama combined into one paranormal romance novel, and all of it is perfection. As with all things, Bellefleur is doing some incredible character work here—maybe some of her best. We’ve got Effie, an immortal demon who has lived centuries, and Finn, a bartender, formerly her Scottish husband in a past life. Effie’s hard exterior finds a home with Finn’s bone-deep certainty, give or take a few arguments. This man takes all of a few seconds to decide he will not be divorcing this beautiful woman and that his past self made the right decision in swearing away his soul. Certainty is sexy, people!! Utilizing the reincarnation trope, Bellefleur looks back to the past as she builds out the present, tethering one to each of her two leads. Whether past or present, this narrative is one of home: where we find it and how we choose it. Watching these two build one side by side will have you WEEPING before the book is done, I guarantee it.
When it comes to romance, there are some authors one can always expect the gut-punching, yearning, heart-wrenching narratives from, and Damned If I Do is proof that Bellefleur is adept at all three. Damned If I Do is where old flames find new beginnings with the paranormal proudly front and center. For Bellefleur, the paranormal isn’t just the demons, troublesome garden gnomes, or soul bargains to Lucifer himself; it’s the past love, now foreign, which granted a certainty to swear away lifetimes, and the loss which has swayed every decision since. Finn and Effie’s reunion in a Georgia bar kicks off a deep dive into their past and who they have been in the centuries since. Finn, homesick for another life—and for her, and Effie, determined to leave the past where it stands. Through dreams, flashbacks, interludes of rage-baiting, and the present-day setting comes a profound narrative of second chances and choosing our home. This novel is a perfect example of what romance can accomplish: narratives that honor our pasts and embrace our present. For what is love without both? Damned If I Do is an ambitious, hot, second chance romance with a devilishly dark side. Its disentangling of the grief, love, and heartache of lifetimes is an emotional journey you won’t want to walk away from. There are few things Alexandria Bellefleur cannot do, and after this, there is nothing I want more than for more paranormal romance from her—for which I would easily bargain away my soul and then some.
Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for providing me with an advance review copy.
Trigger warnings: Death, grief, infertility, traumatic childbirth
